Roller Coaster Hell

Last week was hell. I couldn’t focus. Everything was pissing me off. It was absolutely terrible. The smallest things annoyed me. I did my absolute best not to bring it to work, but everyone else saw the worst of me. I couldn’t figure it out, because nothing was a huge problem.

It wasn’t until Wednesday night diabetes hell that I realized the big frustration was diabetes, and it made it harder for me to deal with the little problems.

I looked at my roommate during the middle of this and whimpered, “I’m scared.” I haven’t been that scared in a long time. Then over the next 24 hours I kept sending screenshots to friends completely frustrated with diabetes. I had so much sugar: ice cream, cider, applesauce, smarties, skittles and probably even more.

Then a friend, who I often forget is not just a friend, and not just a friend with diabetes, but a diabetes educator asked, “would you mind if I logged in to your clarity app?” First I had to figure out what on earth they were talking about, and then I begged. They gave me a LOT of numbers and times to change and I was a little nervous. I still only like to change one thing at a time. But, because this is a friend and not someone on my medical team, I can reach out at any time. So I made the changes. They also suggested we review the changes on Sunday.

I went from this:

To this:

It certainly is not perfect. But it is so much better than it was just a few days ago. I feel like I can handle a few more troubles this week and stay calm in the process.

*As part of the diabetes community, we all reach out to friends. However, my advice to you is to consult your medical team for major changes, not your friends.*