I Went Back
I went back. I didn’t want to. But I did.
It’s good to talk to a doctor about how I feel about my life with diabetes. My friends and family are amazing, and they listen when I need to talk about how I feel about diabetes. But they aren’t trained in how to help me grow from there.
I had a relatively early morning appointment. Which meant it happened at the same time my alarm for Levemir goes off. (Yes, I still need an alarm.) She looked at me like I was interrupting our session, and waited for me to done. This surprised me. This is Joslin; can’t we talk and I take a shot at the same time?!
We went through a whole battery of questions. Most of them were fine, even though I felt defensive answering them. I know this is not how I should feel in this setting; not that I have experience in this setting. We came to one question that made me want to laugh in her face. “Do you feel you have mastered diabetes?”
I went on a soapbox and said “it’s diabetes. It doesn’t get mastered.”
- My weekends are less active now that ski season is over.
- Have you heard of hormones?
- Have you heard of stress?
- Some days I drink more water than others.
- I’m walking more now because my car is out of commission.
- The nicer the weather, the more active I am.
- I’m changing my eating habits.
- Some days are stressful.
- Some days I’ll get too much sun.
- Some days I’ll be too busy to give diabetes the attention it hoards. (I hope it’s good busy.)
Diabetes is an unmasterful beast. I need a doctor who understands that.