I’ve been testing the minimum times needed, keeping a Dexcom on because I can keep up with how I’m doing, taking insulin as needed, playing catchup with highs and avoiding talking about diabetes at almost all costs. I was broken-hearted when my endo left the practice last year and I finally have an appointment with a new one. It’s going to be hard and terrible and intimidating and I don’t want to go at all. My diabetes life is not going to get better if I don’t though. None of these are excuses, but to know why you’re in the spot you are is important. At least I think so. There are a few people I haven’t pulled away from and they have helped me when I cry myself to sleep or diabetes makes me feel weak or the technology dies on me. They know who they are and I am SO grateful to them.
I believe in this blog to be a safe space. Where I can share all of diabetes (that I want to) and find support. Where mental health + diabetes takes priority. Where strength can be found. Where good days are celebrated and bad days are supported. I got a comment recently that tore me down as I’m trying to climb out of this hole. Your negativity is not welcome here.
To the people who have always lifted me up and are giving me the tools to climb out on my own, thank you.